Latest

Tiare Talks

Tiare Tolks lights a match under the buzzword "gaslighting". | SUNDAY STAR TIMES

Gaslighting or growing pains?

In this week’s Sunday Star Times column, Tiare Tolks lights a match under the buzzword “gaslighting”—unpacking what it really means, and what to do when it’s unfairly thrown around. Real relationships need conversation, not TV buzzwords.

Tiare Talks

Love rich, wallet conscious: Beyond the money squabbles | SUNDAY STAR TIMES

Are you counting the cost of cash clashes on your relationship?

Tiare Tolks tackles that awkward moment when your partner's penny-pinching meets your premium coffee habit.

Tiare Talks

Boys weekend? Relationship win anyways | Sunday Star Times

Is it unreasonable to object to lots of boys’ weekends?

Boys' weekends aren’t relationship sabotage! Tiare Tolks says they can actually strengthen bonds, when couples communicate openly and return with fresh appreciation (plus stories about that legendary hole-in-one).

Tiare Talks

Navigating neurodiversity in relationships | Sunday Star Times

How to navigate a relationship with a neurodiverse partner

Understanding neurodiversity in relationships means embracing differences rather than changing them. Open communication, recognising sensory needs, and appreciating unique perspectives create stronger connections. Principles valuable in all relationships.

Blog

Tiare Tolks on expanding your social footprint | April 2025

Expanding your social footprint

Tiare Tolks unpacks the importance of connection and expanding our social circles. From the rise of run clubs to the power of pushing ourselves beyond our comfort zones, she shares fresh insights on building meaningful relationships in unexpected places.

Events

Seeking Input from our community - help shape future events | May 2025

Community Events 2025

We are currently taking the pulse on the types of events our members want to see.

Events

Mingling from your living room | May 2025

More Connections at Your Fingertips

We have a potential new opportunity for our members to participate in mingling events right from their living room!

Blog

Why face-to-face connections are making a comeback | March 2025

Swiping right on real life

Relationship expert Tiare Tolks reminds us that true connections can’t be built through words on a screen alone, real relationships are what keep us alive, literally!

Tiare Talks

Tiare gives her take on the 'Let Them' theory | Sunday Star Times

How 'Let Them' works when it comes to romance

Tiare Tolk playfully unpacks Mel Robbins' "Let Them" philosophy: "They binge reality TV, you hate it… let them." A simple, cheeky take on relationship harmony that honors individuality and boundaries.

Tiare Talks

Navigating dating decisions | Sunday Star Times

Are too many dating choices making you freeze in the face of love?

Tiare is challenging you with thought-provoking questions to help you navigate your next dating move: "If I were stranded on an island for a week, who would I want by my side and why?" Who would you choose?

Tiare Talks

Dating an oat milk connoisseur | Sunday Star Times

Oat milk connoisseur conundrum

When your new partner's coffee preferences involve an encyclopaedic knowledge of Auckland's oat milk brands, is it quirky charm or something to watch? Navigate dating's little surprises, one perfectly frothed oat flat white at a time.

Tiare Talks

Add to your toolkit | Sunday Star Times

Six key steps to getting relationship-ready

Your relationship-ready toolkit: Compatico's relationship expert Tiare shares proven ways to prepare for lasting love. From understanding your own needs to embracing personal growth, discover practical steps for attracting the right person.

Tiare Talks

Navigating the digital dating age | Sunday Star Times

No players please - where are the serious daters?

Ready to swap endless swiping for real connection? Learn smart strategies to spot genuine mature daters and find meaningful relationships in the digital age.

Tiare Talks

Diving into your solo summer | Sunday Star Times

How to navigate the holidays when you’re single

"The mindset you bring to your holiday is what is going to shift the dial," shares relationship expert Tiare Tolks. Learn how to turn this time into opportunities for growth and genuine enjoyment.

Blog

New Year, New You: A Fresh Perspective on Dating | December 2024

New Year, New You

Your next chapter starts with you. Relationship Expert Tiare Tolks brings fresh understanding to finding connection in 2025. She shares how pursuing your interests and living fully creates natural opportunities for meaningful relationships.

Tiare Talks

Summer holiday relationship guide | Sunday Star Times

How to ease the holiday pressure on your relationship

Between checking the boat, sorting the tent and managing summer family dynamics, even the closest couples feel tested. Relationship Expert Tiare Tolks shares practical ways to keep your connection strong this holiday season

Tiare Talks

Let's talk about misophonia: Bringing understanding to the table | Sunday Star Times

Does your partner's chewing grind your gears? You're not alone

Does your partner's eating sounds drive you quietly mad? Relationship expert Tiare Tolks explains misophonia and shares how to handle this common but rarely discussed challenge with grace, understanding and even a dash of humour.

Blog

2024: A year of connections and success | December 2024

Cindy's take on 2024

Watch our latest video as head matchmaker Cindy Mitchener shares 2024’s standout moments—memorable events, lasting connections and the passionate team behind every relationship success.

Blog

Privacy, real talks and true connections | December 2024

Inside Compatico: Hear what makes us unique

Head matchmaker Cindy Mitchener talks about how we create a welcoming space where open conversations happen, including topics like physical intimacy while celebrating the unique diversity of our community. Watch the video to learn more.

Past Events

Tee off for conversation and new possibilities | Friday 14th March

Twilight Golf

Who said golf can't be a great way to meet someone? Tee off for conversation and new possibilities in a relaxed environment.

Past Events

It's time to celebrate you | Thursday 13th February

Singles' Celebration

Enjoy a glass of champagne, canapes, and cocktails with mixing and mingling with Compatico members. It's a night not to be missed and a great way to kick off the new year!

Tiare Talks

Struggling with high dating standards? Tiare reflects on what truly matters | Sunday Star Times

Dream dates dashed: Are you irrational or just being picky?

Dating deal-breakers keeping you single? Relationship expert Tiare Tolks unpacks why we reject promising partners and shares powerful insights on balancing high standards with openness to love.

Blog

Enjoying flying solo over summer | November 2024

Single this summer? Here's how to manage it flying solo

Our relationship expert Tiare Tolks reveals why summer is your season to shine.

Blog

Why simple dating is back | November 2024

The return to meaningful connections

A romantic revolution is brewing – where genuine connections triumph over digital dopamine hits.

Tiare Talks

Time to focus on exploring what might be influencing your partner's dip in desire | Sunday Star Times

How to get your partner’s mojo back in the bedroom

Struggling with changes in intimacy? Compatico’s Tiare Tolks shares expert advice on navigating desire discrepancies, strengthening emotional connections, and revitalizing your relationship.

Tiare Talks

Why do red-hot romances often fizzle out? | Sunday Star Times

How to handle the chemistry that takes dates from buzz to bust

Ever wondered why relationships that start with sparks and excitement can so often end in heartbreak? In her latest Sunday Star-Times column, relationship expert Tiare Tolks dives into why high-energy connections can sometimes be misleading.

Blog

Splitting the bill - what ‘going Dutch’ says about modern dating | November 2024

Who pays? Why splitting the bill matters

'Going Dutch' isn’t just about saving money; it reflects shifts in how we approach relationships, equality and social expectations.

Blog

Creating connections at the Global Love Conference in London | November 2023

Building connections beyond borders at the Global Love Conference

Learn the latest trends from the Global Love Conference, London, where top matchmakers shared their insights on relationship readiness, event-based matchmaking and connecting clients across borders in the world of offline dating.

Blog

Looking for love in all the wrong places? Here's why you might want to skip the bar scene | October 2024

Skip the bar scene for deeper connections – here’s how

In the search for meaningful relationships, bars may not be the ideal place to connect, says Compatico’s Relationship Expert, Tiare Tolks. She tells us why and where to look for true connections instead.

Press

Addressing recent media | October 2024

The real Compatico story

We address the recent media, highlighting its progress in matchmaking, membership clarity and our commitment to fostering genuine relationships.

Tiare Talks

Embracing new relationships without anxiety | Sunday Star Times

How to manage anxiety in new relationships

Anxiety in new relationships often signals unmet needs says Compatico's Relationship Expert, Tiare Tolks. Self-awareness, understanding attachment styles and open communication can help foster healthier connections

Blog

Auckland First-Date Adventures: 10 Fun Ideas to Spark Romance | October 2024

Top 10 fun first-date ideas in Auckland

Discover 10 fun, simple first-date ideas in Auckland! From outdoor adventures to cosy cafes, these tips will help you spark meaningful connections and create memorable moments with your potential match.

Tiare Talks

Situationships Explained | Sunday Star Times

What is a 'situationship' in today's dating world?

As Compatico's relationship expert Tiare Tolks explains, a 'situationship' might offer short-term intimacy but lacks commitment and clarity.

Blog

10 Expert Insights for Finding Love After 40 | September 2024

10 top tips for finding love after 40

Compatico's Relationship Expert Tiare Tolks reveals her top 10 tips for 40-plus dating and why you need to ditch the dating checklists.

Tiare Talks

Are emotional scars stopping you dating? | Sunday Star Times

Is your past holding you back from dating again?

Compatico's Relationship Expert, Tiare Tolks, offers advice on overcoming past trauma in dating by healing, setting boundaries and practising self-compassion.

Past Events

A night of cooking and connections | Wednesday 6th November

Culinary Chemistry

Enjoy a hands on cooking evening at 'Elemental by Sachie' and master the Mekong Delight – Vietnamese Shaking Beef, Crispy Prawns, Vietnamese braised tomato eggplant. Savour mouth-watering bites and connect with fellow singles for a night you won’t forget!

Past Events

Pre-Christmas Cocktail Evening | Thursday 28th November

Christmas Cocktails

Join us for an evening of sparkles, cocktails, festive canapés and connections. Enjoy the rich layers of art, design and heritage in The Libraries, as you sip on cocktails and mingle in a festive and fun setting.

Blog

Seniors between the sheets | September 2024

Dispelling the myths about sex in later years

Our relationship experts share five key insights about intimacy for seniors!

Press

Newstalk ZB | September 2024

Newstalk ZB: Alexander Terblanche talks romance in retirement

Compatico's relationship expert, Alexander Terblanche, joined Newstalk ZB to share his insights into relationships, including love in our golden years. Catch his insights here

Tiare Talks

What is successful pre-date etiquette | Sunday Star Times

How to navigate pre-date etiquette

In this Sunday Star Times column, Compatico’s Relationship Expert Tiare Tolks suggests easing into how much information you share before a first date: 'Be open and honest, but oversharing is the easiest way to scare someone away.'

Past Events

Silky Otter Movie Night | September 2024

Lights, Camera, Connection!

Compatico's movie night at Silky Otter Cinema brought singles together for socialising, drinks and connections.

Blog

Why men should turn to matchmakers for success | September 2024

Men, take the leap into matchmaking!

Tired of the endless swiping and ghosted conversations on dating apps? Discover why more men are turning to personalised matchmaking for deeper, more meaningful connections.

Blog

Exploring age gaps in relationships | August 2024

Is age just a number in love?

In this blog, we look into age-gap relationships and see if there’s a point where the age difference becomes more of a hurdle than a harmonious connection.

Tiare Talks

Growing your ability to connect authentically | Sunday Star Times

Understanding true connection in modern dating

Tiare explores the true meaning of connection in dating. Learn about different types of connections, how to develop authentic bonds, and tips for improving your ability to connect with potential partners.

Blog

August 2024

Single dads and dating: Embracing new beginnings (with a dash of wisdom)

Compatico offers expert advice for dads returning to dating. Discover tips for overcoming challenges and finding meaningful connections.

Past Events

Onslow Arts Lunch | August 2024

Connecting Over Art: Compatico at Onslow

Compatico members enjoyed a relaxed Arts Lunch at Onslow restaurant, featuring Anton Forde’s HUIA exhibition and a lively Q&A session.

Tiare Talks

Age gap relationship advice for mature New Zealand singles | Sunday Star Times

Navigating age differences in relationships

Tiare addresses age gap concerns in mature dating. Learn about navigating future plans, health considerations, and family dynamics in age-diverse relationships.

Past Events

Champagne Event Fizzes with New Possibilities | AUGUST 2024

Sipping and Socialising!

Sommelier Aleksandr Shchepetkin returned for another Champagne tasting event, once again creating numerous connections among our members.

Tiare Talks

Self-Care for Relationship Success | Sunday Star Times

Tiare Talks: Relationship guidance for refilling your life battery

Compatico's Relationship Expert, Tiare Tolks, shares expert advice on how investing in our well-being enhances emotional connections and relationships.

Past Events

Modern Love Symposium | AUGUST 2024

Modern Love: A Cocktail Soirée

In collaboration with The Northern Club, we were delighted to be part of the Modern Love Symposium, an evening of insightful discussions and networking.

Past Events

A Toast to New Connections | JUNE 2024

Sparkling Connections: Compatico’s Champagne Tasting Event

Champagne tasting event sparks lively conversations and new connections.

Past Events

Transforming style from day to night | April 2024

Compatico’s ‘Date Ready’ Style Workshop

Compatico’s ‘Date Ready’ workshop offered expert day-to-evening fashion tips, boosting confidence and celebrating personal style.

Blog

August 2024

Modern Love: Expert tips from Compatico's matchmaking maven

In today’s swipe-right era, is true love possible? Cindy Mitchener, Compatico's Managing Partner Matchmaking, says yes. Compatico prioritises connections over algorithms. Discover her top 10 tips for finding love.

Tiare Talks

Is it possible to get over the ick? | Sunday Star Times

My partner gives me 'the ick', is it possible to get over it?

The 'ick' feeling in relationships can arise suddenly. Compatico's Relationship Expert, Tiare Tolks, explores its causes and offers advice on overcoming it.

Press

Newstalk ZB: June 2024 | Alexander Terblanche on Intimacy Mismatches

Newstalk ZB: Alexander Terblanche Explores the Challenge of Mismatched Intimacy Desires

On his fortnightly slot on Newstalk ZB, Compatico's relationship expert Alexander Terblanche discusses mismatched intimacy desires in couples. He offers insights on navigating this issue, emphasising communication and understanding.

Tiare Talks

Expert tips for harmonious relationships | Sunday Star Times

Finding balance: when your new love comes with children

Compatico's relationship expert Tiare Tolks shares insights on blending families in mature relationships. Discover strategies for navigating complex dynamics with a partner's children.

Tiare Talks

Why authenticity matters: Building trust and connection | Sunday Star Times

Why 'being yourself' matters more than ever in modern dating

Tiare explores authenticity in dating and its importance for genuine connections. She advises mature singles to move beyond surface-level judgments and instead focus on aligning values and life perspectives when seeking meaningful relationships.

Blog

July 2024

Ghosting in online dating: The silent epidemic

At Compatico, we recognise the emotional toll of ghosting, especially in the context of online dating. Relationship expert Tiare Tolks provides insights and advice on navigating this modern dating challenge.

Tiare Talks

Are your dating standards too high? | Sunday Star Times

Managing dating expectations and finding fulfilling relationships

Tiare discusses the impact of high expectations and the ease of making superficial judgments in modern dating. Instead, she encourages people to focus on aligning values and life outlook when meeting someone new.

Press

Newstalk ZB | June 2024

Newstalk ZB: Alexander Terblanche on dating app struggles with Simon Barnett & James Daniels

Compatico's relationship expert, Alexander Terblanche, delves into the complexities of modern dating on Newstalk ZB. With years of expertise in psychotherapy and human sexuality, Alexander offers practical insights on navigating platforms like Tinder.

Tiare Talks

Dating at 70: Confident new beginnings | Sunday Star Times

Confidently dating at 70 - beat the nerves and make a fresh start

Compatico's Tiare Tolks addresses dating at 70. She advises knowing what you want in a relationship, being clear about goals, and staying open-minded when meeting new people. Consider enlisting friends, family, or matchmaking agencies to make connections.

Press

June 2024 | New Zealand Herald

Compatico and Equal Exes unite to redefine dating

Dame Theresa Gattung's Compatico and Bridgette Jackson's Equal Exes redefine dating and relational wellbeing in NZ. They've teamed up to support individuals through life transitions with tailored services.

Press

NZ Herald | June 2024

Navigating dating over 40: Insights on men's health and relationship wellbeing

The challenges of dating over 40 are explored with Compatico's therapist Alexander Terblanche. Research shows single men face high rates of loneliness, impacting mental health. Terblanche highlights the importance of relationships for overall wellbeing.

Tiare Talks

Expert strategies to rekindle your connection | Sunday Star Times

Reigniting your relationship's lost spark

Tiare reveals 8 tips for busy couples to reignite their spark. Learn how small gestures and mindful attention can strengthen your bond.

Tiare Talks

Why your ‘type’ might be holding you back | Sunday Star Times

Unlock the secret to breaking your dating patterns and finding true connection

Tiare addresses a common dating dilemma: being consistently attracted to the same ‘type’ of person with little success. She explains that while having a type can feel comfortable and familiar, it often leads to unfulfilling relationships.

Events

Gift the gift of love… Gift a membership

Help someone in your life to connect with their next partner in life and love. It may be the best gift you ever give them.

Tiare Talks

Balancing pets and potential partners | Sunday Star Times

What happens when pets get in the way of dating?

Is your pet affecting your dating life? In this column, relationship expert Tiare Tolks discusses setting consistent boundaries, including a bed-no-dog zone, to seeking a dog-loving partner who understands your attachment.

Tiare Talks

Why snap judgments are ruining your dates | Sunday Star TImes

From nervous to natural: How to avoid first date mistakes

Tiare explores why snap judgments on first dates can sabotage your chances of finding a meaningful connection. She offers practical tips on how to stay authentic, share airtime equally, and give potential matches a fair chance.

Press

Newstalk ZB | May 2024

Newstalk ZB: Insights from Alexander Terblanche on exploring first date etiquette and relationship dynamics

In this segment, Compatico's Alexander Terblanche delves into key dating dilemmas: Is it appropriate to ask for a kiss on a first date? How should serious relationship topics be broached? And how can couples manage varying levels of intimacy?

Tiare Talks

Balancing expectations and opportunities | Sunday Star Times

Getting back in the dating game later in life

Tiare offers advice for mature singles re-entering the dating scene. Learn about realistic expectations, alternatives to dating apps, and finding genuine connections.

Tiare Talks

Adjust, reflect, and consider before starting a relationship | Sunday Star Times

How long after a breakup should I wait before dating?

After a breakup, there's no set timeline for dating again, says Compatico's relationship expert Tiare Tolks in this Sunday Star Times column. Use this time for self-reflection and understanding past relationship patterns to prepare for future connections.

Press

February 2024

Newstalk ZB Simon Barnett & James Daniels Afternoons: Six and A Song with Theresa Gattung

Theresa Gattung is one of New Zealand’s most successful business people. Her latest venture Compatico, a premium match maker service, has created a lot of buzz already. She spoke about it with Simon Barnett & James Daniels on Newstalk ZB.

Press

February 2024

1News: If there are single guys in New Zealand worth $6000, where are they hiding?

After five years on and off the dating apps, Bianca Zander views the launch of Compatico, Theresa Gattung’s new matchmaking service for the over-40s, with eyes wide open.

Press

February 2024

RNZ: Match making the old fashioned way

Making connections on a romantic level has become increasingly harder for older people. RNZ speak to Tiare Tolks who is the co-founder of match making agency Compatico a service making it easier for ageing romantics to find others without using an app.

Press

February 2024

Kerre Woodham Mornings Podcast: "We want to spread joy and love": Matchmaking service launches for over 40's

Over 40’s are calling time on dating apps, finding it harder to find a partner. Theresa Gattung, former Telecom CEO and co-founder of My Food Bag, is the founder of Compatico, a premium matchmaking service designed to help people find their life partners.

Press

February 2024

Hilary Barry: Matchmaker Theresa Gattung in love with new venture

One of New Zealand's top business leaders is putting her heart on the line with her latest venture — launching a professional matchmaking service. Theresa Gattung sat down with Hilary Barry to discuss.

Press

February 2024

Newstalk ZB Wellington Mornings with Nick Mills: Theresa Gattung launches new matchmaking service for over 40s

New Zealand business leader Theresa Gattung's latest venture is a new professional matchmaking service - Compatico. On Valentines Day, she joined Nick Mills to talk about the new service and who it tailors.

Tiare Talks

Understanding true compatibility for mature singles | Sunday Star Times

Decoding compatibility: The key elements of lasting relationships after 40

Compatico's relationship expert, Tiare Tolks, explores compatibility in mature dating. Learn about attraction, soulmates, and building lasting relationships for singles over 40.

Blog

February 2024

Returning to dating? Here’s how to navigate the messy feelings you may have.

The current dating landscape for over-40s can inspire complicated feelings. We better equip those looking for relationships with insightful tools and advice as they return to dating.

Blog

May 2024

Understanding your attachment style

Tiare Tolks, Compatico Relationship Expert, gives a brief overview of what attachment is, the different attachment styles, and why they matter when it comes to relationships.

Blog

February 2024

Why matchmaking might be right for those over 40 looking for love

Explore why matchmaking and dating services might be right for singles over 40 looking for lasting relationships.

Press

February 2024

Sunday Magazine: Theresa Gattung’s search, and solution, for love

She’s run some of the biggest companies in New Zealand, started others, and been named one of the world’s most powerful women. Now, as Virginia Fallon discovers, Theresa Gattung is tackling her most personal challenge yet.